Roger Clemens is 45. He is also a really good pitcher. However, He is only one man. The Yankees have an undeniabley weak pitching staff this season and have had trouble filling up their pitching rotation. Clemens has been holding out to this point in the season to try and get the most money…. here's what he got in his final deal with the Yankees.

By agreeing in principle to a one-year contract, a certain right-handed fire-baller has laid to rest reams of rumors, mountains of speculation and piles of wish-casting. Roger Clemens is a New York Yankee.

• 28 million dollars for a LESS THAN ONE YEAR CONRACT!
• He only pitches once every seven days (standard for starting pitchers)
• in between starts, he gets to travel home to see his family on a Chartered Yankees Jet

So lets break this down. He gets to

• A. Make a SHITLOAD of money.
• B. Only pitch once a week.
• C. See his family for the other 6 days.

WTF is that? Even Maguyver couldn't come up with a deal that sweet, even IF we gave him a paper clip and a rubberband. Here's to hoping this signing AT LEAST produces some memorable sports moments during the Yankees/Red Sox Games.

28 million dollars, Christ…. 

I'm out

-Andrew "Aleon" Leon